I do believe relationships in the corporate world - with peers, bosses and clients - may be skillfully built up, developed, fostered, improved, managed.
The first aspect in crafting positive and productive relationships is understanding oneself as a means for understanding others.
I believe that the more you know yourself, your reactions, your feelings, the better you are able to deal with them. As a consequence, you will be able to recognize these aspects in others and, hopefully, develop more positive relationships.
Throughout the years I took a lot of interest in tests and quizzes about several psychological and learning aspects. With time, I started recognizing the same aspects in other people and started being able to understand their behavior and effective ways to relate to them.
Click here to access a Google Drive folder with several different tests. Three of the tests I took when I did my MBA program at IBMEC. The other tests are easily found on the web. The tests in the folder are:
These online tests are free and available on the web. I believe that taking the tests in itself is a tremendous opportunity for knowing oneself including when you do not agree with the result.
You might enjoy people's differences with Heart and Brain at The Awkward Yeti. Humor is a specially effective way to reveal individuals' traits.
The second aspect pertinent to crafting relationships is communication.
It is obvious to mention that effective communication is key to a healthy and constructive relationship. Being able to clearly express oneself definitely contribute to building up relationships and managing conflicts.
The phonoaudiologist Leny Kyrillos is a specialist in corporate communication and leadership.
Yes, as a teacher you are part of the corporate world and yes you are a leader in your workgroups and in your classroom.
She has a very quick course on how to speak better, it is just 23 minutes long, so it is worth watching it. Speaking is just one aspect related to effective communication, but a central aspect.
Another point in this area are the Seven Cs of Communication:
I believe that teacher formation programs are poor in aspects related to professional development. EFL events as well focus primarily on teaching techniques, language development, use of resources, but very rarely do we study about topics that other professionals study and practice: career development and management; marketing; economics; politics; and negotiation, for instance.
Negotiation is the next facet associated to crafting relationships that I would like to approach.
Honesty and Openness are two aspects pertaining to Communication as well as to Negotiation. I tackled Negotiation in another presentation last year named Client Relationship in a Language School Environment.
I insist on this topic because every Negotiation specialist and textbooks define it as essentially establishing relationships.
I would like to add one more aspect that I have not mentioned in the other presentation: adopting a position and not abandoning it.
This is the worst mistake someone could make when trying to establish a relationship and it happens quite often.
Imagine how many times colleagues in a workgroup simply defended their point of view and debate to try to convince the other without focusing on a solution?
How many times have you - as a client or service provider - been engaged in a conversation that each party mentioned what the other one failed to accomplish or to deliver and the solution was never reached?
These situations most likely have caused high levels of stress, anger and aggressiveness.
This only happens because of lack of flexibility, adaptability and empathy.
Being more objective, there are two aspects that interfere and disturb the crafting of relationships: perception and perspective.
The word perception comes from the Latin per (thoroughly) + capere (to grasp, to take): to completely and carefully understand a situation in a unique way, adopting that position as the only truth.
Does it ring a bell?
Your perception of people and situations is yours and yours only, but it is not the only one, which brings me to the other obstacle in building up a relationship, perspective. Funnily enough, the Latin prefix is the same, per.
One should not let their perception interfere in their capacity to see different points of view, to reflect on possibilities, instead of debating about different opinions and trying to convince others of one's own positions.
Humor and art are ways to delicately show truths that one cannot easily confront if said regularly.
Here is Joss Stone's song Star. Several verses describe some of the aspects tackled in this post and presentation. Others mention overall principles to the corporate world. Enjoy.
We should be able to say what we think and make love at the end of the day
We should be able to step out out of sin and fall back in our own kind of way
As a skill, it may be acquired, learned, picked up.
The consequence of all these collocations is that anyone has the potential to develop positive, healthy and productive relationships.
This is the aim of this post and presentation, to help you reflect on the topic and find your own ways to successfully relate to others.
This is the aim of this post and presentation, to help you reflect on the topic and find your own ways to successfully relate to others.
However, one must be willing to do so.
Just last Saturday I listened to a very interesting interview with coach and consultant Homero Reis at CBN's Mundo Corporativo. He believes there is a Inteligência Relacional (there is the term Relational Intelligence, but I have not gone deep enough to say if the expression in English has the same meaning and the one used by Homero), which is one's capacity to successfully relate to others.
What really caught my attention in the interview was Homero Reis' point that each individual is responsible for building up healthy relationships with others. The question below represents this accountability:
What is it that I don't know that I need to learn to get along with you?
I am not a psychologist or psychiatrist. This post and the Prezi presentation is a collection of aspects I have realized benefitted me in building up (mostly) positive relationships with my peers, my bosses and my clients.
So, no, this is not group therapy or a transcendental method to be in touch with the souls of humans to generate happiness. The focus here is corporate relationships with peers and clients.
So, no, this is not group therapy or a transcendental method to be in touch with the souls of humans to generate happiness. The focus here is corporate relationships with peers and clients.
This post goes along with the presentation given at the BrazTesol One-Day Seminar held on November 6, 2015.
The first aspect in crafting positive and productive relationships is understanding oneself as a means for understanding others.
I believe that the more you know yourself, your reactions, your feelings, the better you are able to deal with them. As a consequence, you will be able to recognize these aspects in others and, hopefully, develop more positive relationships.
Throughout the years I took a lot of interest in tests and quizzes about several psychological and learning aspects. With time, I started recognizing the same aspects in other people and started being able to understand their behavior and effective ways to relate to them.
Click here to access a Google Drive folder with several different tests. Three of the tests I took when I did my MBA program at IBMEC. The other tests are easily found on the web. The tests in the folder are:
- Dominância Cerebral;
- Envolvimento total: aspectos físicos, mentais, emocionais e espirituais;
- Inventário de autopercepção sobre comportamento em equipe;
- A quick Myers-Briggs test.
- Howard Gardners' Multiple Intelligences - theory and test;
- Daniel Goleman's Emotional Intelligence - theory and test;
- Learning Styles - theory, test 1 (VARK questionnaire) and test 2;
- Myers-Briggs test.
These online tests are free and available on the web. I believe that taking the tests in itself is a tremendous opportunity for knowing oneself including when you do not agree with the result.
You might enjoy people's differences with Heart and Brain at The Awkward Yeti. Humor is a specially effective way to reveal individuals' traits.
The second aspect pertinent to crafting relationships is communication.
It is obvious to mention that effective communication is key to a healthy and constructive relationship. Being able to clearly express oneself definitely contribute to building up relationships and managing conflicts.
The phonoaudiologist Leny Kyrillos is a specialist in corporate communication and leadership.
Yes, as a teacher you are part of the corporate world and yes you are a leader in your workgroups and in your classroom.
She has a very quick course on how to speak better, it is just 23 minutes long, so it is worth watching it. Speaking is just one aspect related to effective communication, but a central aspect.
Another point in this area are the Seven Cs of Communication:
- Clear;
- Concise;
- Concrete;
- Correct;
- Coherent;
- Complete;
- Courteous.
I believe that teacher formation programs are poor in aspects related to professional development. EFL events as well focus primarily on teaching techniques, language development, use of resources, but very rarely do we study about topics that other professionals study and practice: career development and management; marketing; economics; politics; and negotiation, for instance.
Negotiation is the next facet associated to crafting relationships that I would like to approach.
Honesty and Openness are two aspects pertaining to Communication as well as to Negotiation. I tackled Negotiation in another presentation last year named Client Relationship in a Language School Environment.
I insist on this topic because every Negotiation specialist and textbooks define it as essentially establishing relationships.
I would like to add one more aspect that I have not mentioned in the other presentation: adopting a position and not abandoning it.
This is the worst mistake someone could make when trying to establish a relationship and it happens quite often.
Imagine how many times colleagues in a workgroup simply defended their point of view and debate to try to convince the other without focusing on a solution?
How many times have you - as a client or service provider - been engaged in a conversation that each party mentioned what the other one failed to accomplish or to deliver and the solution was never reached?
These situations most likely have caused high levels of stress, anger and aggressiveness.
This only happens because of lack of flexibility, adaptability and empathy.
Being more objective, there are two aspects that interfere and disturb the crafting of relationships: perception and perspective.
The word perception comes from the Latin per (thoroughly) + capere (to grasp, to take): to completely and carefully understand a situation in a unique way, adopting that position as the only truth.
Does it ring a bell?
Your perception of people and situations is yours and yours only, but it is not the only one, which brings me to the other obstacle in building up a relationship, perspective. Funnily enough, the Latin prefix is the same, per.
One should not let their perception interfere in their capacity to see different points of view, to reflect on possibilities, instead of debating about different opinions and trying to convince others of one's own positions.
Humor and art are ways to delicately show truths that one cannot easily confront if said regularly.
Here is Joss Stone's song Star. Several verses describe some of the aspects tackled in this post and presentation. Others mention overall principles to the corporate world. Enjoy.
Give me strength
Don't give me grief
I don't wanna break or mend
Your beliefs
I wanna hear ya
And keep my mind free
I'm not gonna judge ya
I hope you don't judge me
Don't give me grief
I don't wanna break or mend
Your beliefs
I wanna hear ya
And keep my mind free
I'm not gonna judge ya
I hope you don't judge me
Tell me do you feel an angel somehow
Has given you the right
To advise the world and his wife
How to live their lives
Whoever you may be
Whatever walk of life
It's you who hold your light
It's up to you whether to hide it
Or let it shine
Has given you the right
To advise the world and his wife
How to live their lives
Whoever you may be
Whatever walk of life
It's you who hold your light
It's up to you whether to hide it
Or let it shine
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
Speak a solution
You can keep your problems
I hear your opinion
And yes we've got 'em
Somebody's trash is somebody's treasure
Somebody's laugh is
Somebody's pain
Somebody's loss is somebody's gain
It don't matter what car yo drive
Or whatever sound you like
It don't matter if you're praying to God
Or trusting mother nature's strife
What's true to you and I maybe
Won't be right for another kind of life
Can't we agree to disagree and we can be happy
You can keep your problems
I hear your opinion
And yes we've got 'em
Somebody's trash is somebody's treasure
Somebody's laugh is
Somebody's pain
Somebody's loss is somebody's gain
It don't matter what car yo drive
Or whatever sound you like
It don't matter if you're praying to God
Or trusting mother nature's strife
What's true to you and I maybe
Won't be right for another kind of life
Can't we agree to disagree and we can be happy
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
We should be able to say what we think and make love at the end of the day
We should be able to step out out of sin and fall back in our own kind of way
It's ok if you don't wanna see, it's ok if you disagree
Just reach inside of yourself and realize that we're one of a kind
And all that you are is just fine know that you're you and I'm me
Free to fly
Free to fall
Free to learn, love and lie
It's up to you to live
If you don't know what to do with yourself, just breathe
Just reach inside of yourself and realize that we're one of a kind
And all that you are is just fine know that you're you and I'm me
Free to fly
Free to fall
Free to learn, love and lie
It's up to you to live
If you don't know what to do with yourself, just breathe
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
We are who we are
Love us or move on
Don't you know that there's a star guiding everyone
Live, live, live
Let live
Again
What is it that I don't know that I need to learn to get along with you?
It is everyone's responsibility to try and build up healthy, positive, constructive and effective relationships. One must be willing to do so and must develop the skills for this task.
All the best,
Marcelo Elias
Let live
Again
What is it that I don't know that I need to learn to get along with you?
It is everyone's responsibility to try and build up healthy, positive, constructive and effective relationships. One must be willing to do so and must develop the skills for this task.
All the best,
Marcelo Elias
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